Descent into Alzheimer's Disease

I’m very sad tonight. Don’t know why, I just am.

I dreamt about Mom last night. I dreamed that she lived in some sort of facility and was doing really well. The person I was speaking with said Mom was a little grouchy once, but other than that had been very congenial. They had her working as a waitress and she was doing fine. She had been much worse with me because I had been holding her back and causing her to have all those horrible symptoms. But all that was a mistake and she was really pretty fine. I felt concerned that the pressures of being a waitress might cause Mom to act out, but was amazed at her remarkable recovery.

Of course it’s impossible that anything like that could really happen. It’s very difficult for Mom to complete even the simplest act. Like ‘hand that to me’ or ‘come over here’. Alzheimer’s has slowly destroyed her brain cells. She can turn on the faucet to get water, but then forgets how to make it stop. She rips open a loaf of bread from the center, oblivious to the fact that will cause the entire loaf to go stale. She forgets where to urinate, but only sometimes. She’ll open the refrigerator, knowing food may be found there, never thinking to close the door. She’ll open the front door and put the dog outside, not realizing there is no fence and it’s not safe. She forgets how to open the car door and cannot buckle a seat belt. When the AC is on in the car she runs her fingers all around the window, trying to find the source. She’ll refuse to put on a coat and then say she’s cold. Overall, she is basically helpless.

A waitress? No. But a dream is a dream and I wasn’t asking for much. I didn’t dream her a president, or a lawyer, or a doctor. I didn’t dream her the CEO of a successful company. A waitress isn’t much to ask, is it? It was just a little dream. Maybe I’m the one who will be the waitress. Time will tell if I must revisit my youth on that realm.

Acts 20:35 I have shewed you all things, how that so labouring ye ought to support the weak, and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive.